If you’re currently sat in an office, eating your lunch in your tiny little cubicle with an audiobook of Game of Thrones in your ears while your colleagues gather around the communal kitchen, it’s safe to say that you’re doing something wrong. Nope, you’re not getting GoT wrong – you can carry on until winter comes with that little nugget – but you’re getting the whole we’re-not-colleagues-we’re-friends thing totally wrong. On the whole, you probably spend more time with your work friends than you do your real friends each week, which means it’s better if they do actually like you. If you’re struggling with that, check out these 5 ways to use psychology to make your colleagues like you more…
Ask more questions
If you keep yourself to yourself in your workplace, you are not allowing people to get to know the awesome personality that you have. One of the best ways to make your colleagues like you more and to allow them an insight into your own life is to ask more questions. By asking them questions, you open the floor for discussion and questions right back at ya. Don’t believe us? Well, one study that was published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology in 2017 used 2000 participants to prove that asking more questions made them more likable, and the results were astounding.
As for a favor
Okay, we know that some people absolutely hate asking for favors, but if it’s going to help your colleagues like you more – why not give it a try? If you ask someone for a favor, you are showing them that you trust the knowledge and the talent that they have and that you trust that they would be able to help you. This not only heightens their self-esteem, but it also shows you to be more vulnerable. This normally allows people to feel closer to you, which means that they will like you even more.
Find a common enemy
We’ve all seen Mean Girls, and we’ve all seen what happens when Cady and the rest of The Plastics fill out their Burn Book… they bond! This is because we all like to know that other people have the same struggles and the same views on people as we do, and one of our strongest emotions (sadly) is hate. Finding a common enemy either inside or outside of the office will not only give you and your colleagues something to rant over, but it will also show them that they are just like you. Once they realize that you have the same values and opinions as they do, they will like you even more. Just be careful not to be too mean to anyone or get into trouble at work!
Look like you’re listening
There is nothing worse than talking to someone who has their head in their phone, is eyeballing others around the office, or just yawning in your face. It’s pretty darn rude. While it may be that these people are actually listening but look like they aren’t, the best way to make people like you is to listen AND look like you’re listening at the same time. By engaging in eye contact and greeting them with attention and friendliness, you will show that you are giving them the attention that they think they deserve, which will ultimately make them like you even more.
If you’ve been swatting up on Bill Clinton speeches, you may remember a famous speech where he opened with, “Hi, folks. Well, I’m sorry about the rain.” Of course, Clinton isn’t in control of the weather (or is he?) which means that he has no real reason to apologize – but he did so anyway, and the speech soon became one of his best. It’s the same in a work environment. If you apologize necessary for things such as the weather, or traffic, people will feel much warmer towards you.
Want your colleagues to like you even more? Well, follow these 5 rules and you’ll find plenty of new office besties in no time.